I first heard about Rosemary Tonks when I came across a copy of her book, Bedouin of the London Evening: Collected Poems, on my library’s Borrowbox app. I’m not going to lie that I was excited by it, I simply liked her trousers on the books front cover. I had also part listened to a programme on Radio 4 called The Exploding Library about her book The Bloater. You can listen to it HERE.

After a couple of pages of not expecting much, I became engrossed. I loved it and I loved her wit and sarcasm. I spent a lot of tired mornings from reading into the night, waiting to start it up again later.

On further investigation and some googling it appeared that she led a busy and hectic life until the early 1970’s when she, as the poet Brian Patten says "evaporated into air like the Cheshire cat" on a BBC Lost Voices half-hour feature, The Poet Who Vanished. I cannot find anywhere to listen to the episode, but it might turn up one day.

Hearing all this I liked her even more. I liked how she took control of her life and made a new one on her own terms. However, it wasn’t all great as a series of family traumas and renouncing Christianity led her down a path of reclusiveness and health problems. She moved to Bournemouth in the 1980’s and lived out her life as Mrs Lightband until her death in 2014.

What has made me want to find her resting place is that she is buried in Warblington in Hampshire. The church and graveyard is featured in the film Tommy and I have often walked the coffin path at the side of the church to the beach.

So on a cold and frosty January afternoon, off I went to try to find her.

On Neil Astleys Guardian piece, it states,

“She was buried on Thursday 1 May, near her mother in the graveyard of the church of St Thomas a Becket, Warblington, Hampshire, without a funeral or any ceremony, in line with her wishes: the body was only a vessel for the spirit. If her instructions are followed, the name on her headstone will be "Rosemary Desmond Boswell Lightband".

A bit of searching here and there and some very loud shouts from the Brent geese finally brought me to her. A Robin landed nearby but they always do in graveyards.

Go HERE to read Rosemary’s obituary. HERE to buy her book. HERE to read Neil Astleys piece about her and HERE to listen and read some of her poetry.

Rosemary Tonks (Rosemary Desmond Boswell Lightband), poet.

Born 17 October 1928.

Died 15 April 2014.